after all is said and done

I got
3 presents
1 cake
3 birthday cards

despite the many wishes on facebook I don’t think it was a very happy one! Like more people than usual pissed me off, and I didn’t feel more sensitive than usual.
1. first was the oversensitive person who still seems as self-absorbed as ever.
conclusion: do not talk to people who do not make the cut to be a close friend as a close friend. some people just don’t get things and should not be bothered with. zomg. Not everything is about you!
Also, I hate people who say a bad thing and then end it with “but no worries.” Then what on earth would you tell me the bad thing for if you don’t want me to worry? It’s like a doctor saying “oh by the way, you have cancer, but no worries, everyone dies at some point anyway.” What a completely idiotic remark. If you really didn’t want me to worry, you wouldn’t have told me the bad thing in the first place. obviously.
2. Second was the card from a certain someone who thanked me (on my birthday, somehow this is related), for being lz’s companion. Yes, I’m very special. I exist to accompany a certain mr. wong. I’d rather not have gotten that card at all. It must be really difficult to think of something nice to say about me. Oh, like in Chris’s card where she says I have blessed her with my music and in michelle’s email where she said knowing me was her happiest experience at cornell. Very difficult indeed, because I am only useful/special as long as mr. wong does not feel lonely. I feel so special! Being such a great companion! Perhaps one day I can work in a nursing home cleaning out bedpans! seeing as how I make such a great companion for people. I could talk to all those old people and prevent them from dying of loneliness.

I know it’s just a regular day in a regular year, and I don’t really expect people to remember it (or care if they do), much less give me stuff. But I do wish that at least for that one day they all wouldn’t be quite so egoistic. I don’t even need to feel special. I’m just asking that they don’t piss me off. Is that very difficult?
It doesn’t feel quite as bad being pissed off on a regular day than on your birthday, because that’s when it becomes crystal clear that some people just don’t give a shit about you.



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