Cattitude


When the sunlight filters through my window in the basement I can see all the dust particles dancing through the air. They move in circles, widening and tightening circles with nowhere to settle on, like my thoughts.

I am home early today, before nightfall for the first time this week. Had mind numbingly painful cramps in the morning and decided I wanted to go home and take my pink aspirin instead of gritting my teeth and pretending to be okay in class.

It is nice being alone and being quiet for awhile. To rest and to think jumbled, dancing thoughts that go in circles like the dust. When there are too many things to do I forget to think. I forget to thank God for all the bountiful blessings in my life.

It is quiet in my neighbourhood. There are no wild animals, no squirrels, or chipmunks, or deer, or bunnies, or mallards. I kind of miss the wildlife in Ithaca. But I do have a cat, who moves in and out of the house at leisure, and rubs his stripey body against my legs in a gesture resembling grudging acceptance of my existence in his house. Erika says she doesn’t understand why so many people assume all domestic animals have to like them. Why should a cat like you right off the bat? What obliges a cat to like you? He hardly knows you! Cats are not so different from humans. They have a mind of their own and are allowed to decide whether or not they approve of you. And ultimately, they won’t necessarily decide to like you. We have no right to expect that. Even worse are the humans who think all humans have to like them. Ha.

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