Things I thought I would never eat

1. mushy peas. the ones i used to make artwork of when they were left over after my fish and chips. i think the secret is to add a creaming agent and also put some chickpeas into the mix.
2. mustard (on hotdogs and burgers or in sandwiches)
3. sour cream and salsa (with tortillas or fajitas) not that i’d eat tortillas and fajitas to begin with.
4. pickles. i can actually eat them whole now in one long cucumber when i used to pick the tiny sliced ones out of my cheeseburgers
5. doner kebab. is surprisingly good. but only chicken i.e. the one on the spike that has strata, not like the lamb ones which just looks like one big hunk of mystery meat
6. clams and clam chowder
7. prosciutto and melon. it’s weird, but it’s alright. for an antipasto i don’t fancy it much but then i haven’t lived in italy.
8. pesto. perfect for dipping warm breads and mozzarella. i was completely turned off by this when i first came to the states. i mean it looks like some kind of fungus scraped off the bathroom floor.
9. jalapeños (still only in certain things, like it’s okay in pizzas and mozzarella sticks)
10. chicken noodle soup. full of msg goodness. used to think it was a horrible spinoff some chinese consommes. i don’t mean the maggi one which is alright i mean the weird american ones they sell in au bon pain and stuff.

amazing what staying in another country can do to you and how it can alter your tastebuds (or at least make them compromise).

however, there are still things i would never eat (having tried them again after bad childhood experiences)
1. sushi (what is with the rice?? why is it bloddy doused in vinegar?)
2. sashimi (you really can’t get lazier than this.)
3. chinese conches (ahem made to eat them out of politeness at a pseudochinese dinner in rotterdam with my uncle who kept putting them on my plate cause he adored them.)
4. parsley
5. papaya (the stuff actually has exactly the same consistency when it goes in and when it comes out! suspicious much?)
6. lamb
7. sundried tomatoes. not food.
8. oysters (the large raw kinds) and oyster omelette. they taste like seabed.
9. melton mowbray pork pies. the things are actually grey inside.
10. dirty rice with beans. definitely not by themselves and what do you think you’re doing putting them in my wraps?

i think i’m getting grumpier and better at grumbling after reading the mitchell and webb book. those boys take disgruntled grousing to an art form.



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